Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
