I must be too annoying 4 u.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
