who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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