he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
