Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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