My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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