I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
