After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
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