when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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