I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Come on in and take your pants off
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