so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
