i jhust puked up my retainher.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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