i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Idk if I want to put a bra on
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
