Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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