Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
