thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Randomize
