Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
