I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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