i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
