you would pick up someone in the library
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
