So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
