And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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