please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I understand Curling. That high.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
