I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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