we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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