i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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