I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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