she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
