You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Randomize
