Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
