If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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