AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
