this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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