Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
