i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
