Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
