who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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