Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
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