The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize