I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Randomize
