Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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