They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
