Little spoons don't ask big questions
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
