U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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