the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
