That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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