I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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