do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
