do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize