Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
he had hair everywhere except his balls
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
