Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
You are the jesus of drinking
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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